It’s not Semen

I love fruits. I love all fruits, even the ones that cause one to itch like pineapples do. I found a fruit shop sometimes around the period I lost my phone but didn’t have the time or energy to go be in fruit heaven. Then came today. The sun was up before I was which is quite rare. I started the day with Kong Fu Panda 2, had a good laugh whilst constantly being reminded of fruits and vegetables.  That was when my thoughts ran straight to the fruit shop. So out I went, not to the fruit shop, to the guy who’s fabricating some equipment for me, and then to my friend who sells weed. Not for his weed but for some script he was to help peruse. He’s a great critic when he’s high. And then I headed for the fruit shop. Let me point out that asides the shirt on the weed guy, the calendar on the wall by the side of the fabricator guy, there were several other places I saw pictures of fruits, so I thought to self that today was definitely my day.
I started with two servings. Two servings of everything they had. It was like I was fresh out the Garden of Eden.
After I had my fill, paid the bill and set out for some kick back time I noticed on more than five occasions people looking my way. What now, am I glowing from all that fruit? That would have been great but several other people later and having a chat with two guys on my next project, I saw it. These morons were all looking at the stain really close to my zipper. Must’ve been the pineapple but Lord I wanted to sink in the ground. I had been around town looking like semen was on my fly. Not sure how I went to the bathroom and not sure how I got back either but I do recall bringing up again and again how I loved the fruits i had earlier devoured but how pissed I am that some fruit juice stained my pants.

So if you saw me today walking around with a stain around there, it’s not semen.

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