Of The Best Way To Die


Death is all too sudden. But in some cases, it isn’t.
You’re crossing the street concentrating on your mobile device when a crazy truck driver, not looking where he’s going, picks you up and dumps you twenty feet away.
You’re at a roadside cafe at the bottom of your apartment building having tea, when the unbalanced flowerpot you absent-mindedly positioned drops from your balcony on the sixth floor and finds your head.
You’re at the train station awaiting the next train, excited about a new post you’re viewing as you drift too close to the edge of the platform. Suddenly, a train from nowhere swipes your hand – and face.

These aren’t the best ways to get oneself killed, intentionally or otherwise. At best you get a few seconds of lassitude. This situation does not allow for enough brain activity. You know, the kind that allows for you to realize what’s happening to you and what you should and must do. You experience unco-ordinated bodily movements, such as a dying creature makes. You probably then see the light.  But you’re too out of mind and body, so to speak,  to spend that time judiciously. What do i mean? For many believers in a deity,  this window could have been used to ask for forgiveness from the most high. To pray that their soul be accepted in heaven (or whatever its called in their religion) despite all the attrocities they have committed.

So now, which is the best way to die? Its that way that will give you ample time to ensure you get through the pearly gates after your soul is sucked from your body.

I don’t know this way. You got to figure it out yourself. Oh wait, were you expecting me to… Oh, c’mon!


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