You know them, right? They’re everywhere. You could even be one of them.
One of those who act like its a crime not to have enough cash at hand and do everything possible to “feel among”.
The ones that borrow money to buga.
You know na, those that take cab for N3,000 when all they have in heaven and on earth is N5,000 just so their friends or neighbours will call them “big” when they see them alight from the cab while faking a call.
Those who take bike for a distance of 100meters just because they don’t want to be seen trecking.
Those who buy N1000 suya and immidiately wish they hadn’t because the people they tried to show off to didn’t notice.
Those who buy bottled water with their “last 80card” and walk, no, trek the rest of the way as if N5 “pure water” is a crime. Now, that bottled water issue is another thing entirely, why carrying a bottle with just about a gulp of water in it?..if you won’t drink it then put it in your bag or throw it away na. Some even carry empty bottles!
The ones that do all they can to re-activate their expired BIS, including steal.
And when they finally get back online after a few days to one week of being offline, their PM reads “network is soo bad”. As if na network cause am.
Those who go to Malls for the sole purpose of taking pictures with either themselves at the foreground of a fine background or with whatever meal or snack they have saved up to buy.
Those that borrow make-up, footwear and handbag for an outing.
The ones that “collect” perfume or bodyspray from neighbour just before they set out.
They’re there at every bustop, lecture theater and street. Forming levels bigger than their wallet can carry.
But we call them and they see themselves as big boiz and girls.
The next time you see them, just eye them for me.